Mulondo is a television personality and radio presenter with KFM. At the same time, Manuela Mulondo is a social worker who runs ‘The Cradle’, a 24-hour service provider of quality childcare for children aged newborn to four years.
The two met en route to a trip to Kenya. Brian Mulondo and Manuela Pacutho were at university and going to ministry. It so happened that two different people in that ministry invited them.
The trip was cheap. “Talk about wanting to go abroad for free of charge,” Pacutho adds. To his recollection, the story was longer than she relays.
“Our meeting is such a long story. Do we have time? Manuela’s version is way too funny but we met on a bus to Nairobi. I was seated on a stool in the bus corridor. We were part of a Christian group called Celebration Zoe that was going to Nairobi for a week to minister to universities,” he recounts.
The two connected. Mulondo was blown away the entire time he talked to her. They also prayed and laughed. On the way back, he told Manuela that he would marry her, to which she laughed so loudly.
He had kick-started a seven-year journey of dating during which he not only needed to put his best foot forward but to convince her to accept his marriage proposal.
She was no easy pie. She was beautiful, had values, and needed a man that would size up to her expectations. To his recount, “Phew! I suffered. I can say, it was worth the wait.”
Beyond the fantasy projections that the word conjures up in people’s minds when the word or subject of love is introduced or mentioned, she needed to understand and appreciate who he is. There was no better way than to first slow it down, and start from basic principles of friendship.
With a friend, you have no reason to put up pretenses; you joke, laugh, get silly and even wrong to each other and say sorry, move on and keep flickering on a pure and plain relationship that is built on a realistic foundation of communication and sharing.
So today, even if Pacutho and Mulondo are upset with each other, their need to share what happened in their day, with each other, slips through the anger wall.
Like that, issues get to be addressed and resolved. “You can never exhaust the need to communicate. It’s cliché but very true that communication doesn’t mean talking but one person putting themselves in another person’s shoes before they put their point forward,” Pacutho observes.
One’s individuality cannot be overstated. She argues that one needs to be happy and content on their own before they think it’s someone else’s responsibility to make them happy.
“Be the best version of yourself, be better than you were yesterday, improve yourself. Marriage is an opportunity to witness someone else’s life and give account for it, not an opportunity to become someone else,” she adds.
She has learnt that accepting that she knows nothing about marriage because no one ever goes to marriage school, should allow couples time to learn from other couples, to learn from marriage seminars, to read and find what would work for their unique union.
The couple has been married for seven years. Mulondo says it is crucial to decide what your relationship will look like, otherwise you will crush as soon as you start.
“It’s important that you establish why you want to be with someone, without the “expectations” of marriage because when the marriage isn’t going great, you fall back to those ones. Does he make you laugh, Is he your friend? Lugambo-mate et al.”
Handling finances
Mulondo and Pacutho put all their money in one account, then apportion it; 10 percent tithe, 10 percent in investment, 10 percent life insurance, 10 percent, keep 10 percent into emergency, 10 percent given and spend the 50 percent, to cater for school fees, rent, utilities, shopping, and a monthly stipend for each of us.
“We are going to attend a ‘Straight Forward Financial Growth’ masterclass with financial advisor, Pastor Moses Mukisa starting this October to see what we can do better with our finances,” she adds.
“She says I am the better Finance guy but over the years, we have appreciated our strengths and weaknesses in the areas of finances. We pool everything and split it across the different things we want to spend on. A non-negotiable thought is tithe and savings,” Mulondo explains.
The couple’s advice is to believe that each of them is an individual before they think of the other person. “Support each other’s dreams and aspirations because when life is going well for you, happiness is a given. God will fight the rest of your battles,” he adds in a somewhat conclusion.
